The Downward Spiral of Automatic Thoughts
Do you ever have negative thoughts about yourself that come out of nowhere? Even if you’re having a good day or you thought you succeeded at something, this voice is the first to remind you that you are not worthy.
Of course, this is simply not true but your mind plays tricks on you. We are hard-wired to have a negative bias based on evaluation and survival skills. But, those survival skills are just not necessary anymore for our day-to-day life.
These negative, exaggerated thought patterns are called automatic thoughts or cognitive distortions and we all experience them from time to time. For some of us, frequently engaging with these thoughts can cause a warped and negative view of ourselves, the people around us, and the world.
It’s even harder to get out of this downward spiral of negativity when you start believing and accepting that these thoughts are normal. You can’t change something if you don't even recognize its harmful impact.
Here are a few types of automatic thoughts:
Filtering
I may have aced the science test, but it doesn’t even matter because I still suck at math.
Catastrophizing
What if? What if they think I’m weird? What if something bad happens?
Discounting the positive
I’m not beautiful. They were just being nice.
Jumping to conclusions
She hasn’t responded yet. She must hate me.
Fallacy of fairness
I did him a favor, so it’s only fair that he does xyz for me.
Blaming
It’s your fault that I feel this way.
Shoulds
I should never make mistakes.
Always being right
My opinion is better than everyone else’s.
How can you stop thinking negatively?
If you are constantly bombarded by these types of thoughts, you can become stressed, anxious, and overwhelmed.
The first step is recognizing these negative filters and understanding them for what they are. They are not a representation of who you truly are, so work on redirecting them into positive thoughts and energy.
If you need help getting started, try some of the Balanced + Well worksheets attached below.
Some other helpful practices include:
Practice gratitude. Try to focus on the positive things in your life instead of harping on the negative. Start by writing down 3 things that you’re thankful for. When you can find things about yourself or others that you appreciate, this positivity can filter out the cynicism associated with automatic thoughts.
Mindfulness. Take a step back and remind yourself that things aren’t as bad as they seem. Clear your mind with some easy mindfulness exercises that you can find on this blog. Even if those bad thoughts start to creep into your mind, mindfulness can help ground you and relieve some stress and anxiety.
Self-love and care. Be kind to yourself even when you don’t feel your best. You are not lazy or worthless because you didn’t complete your daily tasks. Tomorrow is a new day to prove that you can do it, so allow yourself to be human. Take a bubble bath, go for a walk, or do whatever else makes you happy.
Self Love in Six Steps Worksheet
Let’s manifest positivity in our lives because we all deserve happiness. For more tips, feel free to join the Balanced + Well community by signing up for the newsletter and booking a free discovery call with me.